New Computer Software Memo:

[Hacker1713006064]

Subj: NEW SOFTWARE MEMO:

 

To: All Staff Members

CC: Management

From: Development

Date: Today!!

 

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

 

This memo is to announce the development of a new firm-wide software system.

 

We are currently building a data center that will contain all company data Since

Year 2000. The program is referred to as the

 

"Millennia Year Application Software System" (MYASS).

 

Next Monday at 9:00 there will be a meeting in which I will show MYASS to everyone.

We will continue to hold demonstrations throughout the month so that all employees

will have an opportunity to get a good look at MYASS.

 

As for the status of the implementation of the program, I have not addressed

the networking aspects, so currently only one person at a time can use MYASS.

This restriction will be removed after MYASS expands. Several people are using the

program already, and have come to depend on it. Just this morning I walked into a

subordinate's office and was not surprised to find that he had his nose

buried in MYASS.

 

I've noticed that some of the less technical personnel are somewhat afraid of

MYASS. Just last week, when asked to enter some information into the program, I had

a secretary say to me: "I'm a little nervous, since I've never put anything in MYASS

before." I volunteered to help her through her first time, and when we were through,

she admitted that it was relatively painless, and she was actually looking forward

to doing it again. She went so far as to say that, after using SAP and Oracle, she

was ready to kiss MYASS.

 

I know there are concerns over the virus that was found in MYASS upon initial

installation, but I am pleased to say the virus has been eliminated and we were able

to save MYASS. In the future, however, protection will be required prior to

entering MYASS.

 

We planned this database to encompass all information associated with the business.

So, as you begin using the program, feel free to put anything you want into MYASS.

As MYASS grows larger, we envision a time when it will be commonplace to walk by an

office and see a manager hand a paper to an employee and say,

"Here, stick this in MYASS".

 

This program has already demonstrated great benefit to the company during recent

OSHA and EPA audits. After requesting certain historical data the agency

representatives were amazed at how quickly we provided the information. When asked

how the numbers could be retrieved so rapidly our Environmental Manager

proudly stated:

 

"Simple, I just pulled them out of MYASS".